- Don’t get two parking tickets before the date even starts.
- Don’t critique his driving skills (especially if he’s driving your car).
- Don’t invite your best friend Kathy.
- If the area around the restuarant is ghetto, do not say so.
- Upon getting chicken feet, a dish you do not particularly like, do not order your best friend to “eat those feet, bitch”.
- Upon thinking of said order, don’t laugh so hard that you spit your chashu bow into your date’s water cup.
- If food does end up floating in said water cup, do not fish out food with chopsticks.
- Towards the end of the meal, do not ask your Asian friend to ask the waiter if there are taro balls. And do not say loudly, “I like those balls.”
- If said event happens, and there are no taro balls available, do not demand in a very loud voice, “WHY?”
- At the dessert locale after lunch, when your best friend lets you taste her yogurt, do not move directly towards it and lick the top. Do not proceed to laugh at her confused face, either.
Today was a wonderful day. Carl and I went to dim sum with my best friend Kathy, and although I proceeded to break all of the above rules, Carl asserts that he continues to accept me. Luckily, we have stopped counting how many dates it has been. How lovely, indeed.
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